One thing you ’ll memorize from the new installment of DC ’s eldritch , junk - intellectual nourishment specialness task : Harland Sanders is like a Kentucky Fried Christ who died and came back to life to spread out the gospel of finger - lickin ’ poultry portion . The alphabetic character column enunciate so .
KFC : The Colonel Corpsfollows up on last class ’s flakey story that introduced dead restaurateur / corporate mascot Colonel Harlan Sanders asa top-notch - ornery character in the DC Universe . It opens with the Colonel having a dizzy spell and then getting a visit from an alternative - realism adaptation of himself :
Colonel Sunder , the fingerbreadth - lickin ’ fiend who got his guessing - what - crybaby - butt kick last year , is messing with the nous of Sanderseseses all over the multiverse , stealing crucial mystical - recipe knowledge from their white - haired noggins . Sanders - Prime and his female analog resolve to use a Flash and a cosmic treadmill to traipse through metre and space , gather allies and regain out what ’s going on .
Every realism in the DC multiverse freaking loves Kentucky Fried Chicken . How could they not in a comic make to shill for the world ’s run purveyor ofsecret - recipe frankenfoods ? So what variety of Colonel - tastic variant superhero abomination do we meet in KFC : Crisis on Infinite Colonels ? Let ’s see :
Hardcase Harland , a police detective in the reality where Gotham by Gaslight happen . His billy club is more like a drumstick of doom for ne’er - do - wells .
Koln - el , a Sanders - alike in the Kingdom Come reality who ’s patently of Kryptonian origin . Now we lie with who was in charge of the commissary in Superman ’s gulag …
Kolonel , biped fowl resident of the post - apocalyptic Kamandi macrocosm . Yes , this ‘ hero ’ is a man / bird loanblend who slaughters and electrocute his genetical cousins for aggregate consumption .
Teen Colonel is the chibi - inflected cartoon Harlan who live in the Teen Titans Go universe . Do n’t flurry him with … .
Colonel Lad , a thirty-first century descendent with creepy facial hair who somehow is not a appendage of the Fatal Five .
There ’s more but this comedian is free and you should really go try the grease yourself . Once the multiversal squad is all gather , they take the fight to Col . Sunder and his new compatriot Colonel Grodd , another bad - guy version of Harland Sanders .
volaille - electrocute combat ensues , the honest guy wire pull ahead and contractually - obligated corporal sloganeering gets blunder out .
I keep tell myself that these DC + KFC comics are bad for me , just like the artery - clogging meal huckster by the multinational fast food chain . But I could n’t stop translate the Double Down of superhero advertorial cartoon strip . I feel guilty in my mind and hungry in my gut . Good thing I live in a spot where the Colonel has real challenger .
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