Relationship cheatersget a bad tap , but fresh inquiry suggests that conjoin people who have affair often feel great about their infidelity and are rarely excruciate with guilt . Even more surprisingly , the study authors found that cheat is not generally motivated by a deficiency of dear for one ’s mate or unhappiness in one ’s marriage , and that playing the field of operation does n’t always direct to relationship problems .

The researchers surveil around 2,000 registered exploiter of Ashley Madison , a website that solicit up married mass who want an social function . After analyzing participant ’ responses regarding the state of their marriage , their motivation for cheating , and their overall life satisfaction , the generator discover some surprising style .

“ citizenry have a diversity of motivations to chouse , ” explained field of study generator Dylan Selterman in astatement . “ Sometimes they ’ll chisel even if their relationship are pretty skillful . We do n’t see solid evidence here that people ’s affairs are associated with lower relationship quality or lower life satisfaction . ”

Curiously , cheaters reported high level of love for their spouse and rarely mention emergence like anger or a lack of commitment towards their significant other as their main reason for playing aside from base . However , around one-half of participants said they were not sexually dynamic with their better half and identify a lack of sexual satisfaction as the driving force play behind theirinfidelity .

A desire for independence and keen intimate diversity also stand up out as motivate factors , and most respondents reported high levels of satisfaction in theirextramarital affairs .

“ In pop medium , telecasting show and movies and books , hoi polloi who have affairs have this intense moral guilty conscience and we do n’t see that in this sample of participants , ” said Selterman . “ Ratings for satisfaction with affairs was high – sexual satisfaction and excited satisfaction . And feelings of sorrow were downhearted . These determination paint a more complicated picture of infidelity compared to what we thought we knew . ”

final result also indicated that lease in extramarital activeness was not link to a lessening in relationship timber with one ’s spouse . However , the author sharpen out that the vast majority of respondents were middle - aged men , and it ’s unclear if this content is divvy up by women or non - binary masses who have affairs .

Nonetheless , Selterman say that “ the take - home point for me is that maintaining monogamy or sexual exclusivity especially across hoi polloi ’s life is really , really hard . ”

“ masses just assume that their pardner are survive to be all satisfied have sexual activity with one individual for the next 50 years of their life sentence but a fortune of people fail at it . ”

The study is published inArchives of Sexual Behavior .